Sex and Death
The great goddess cuts off her own head severing ignorance in the alchemical transformation of greed, anger, ignorance, delusion, lust, and jealousy through the very root of all of life - sex
There we were seated in front of a wall of fire inside the Chinnamasta Temple, not the innermost sanctum with the sunken yoni, but the larger chamber just inside its main doors. I can’t remember which day of the Ambubachi Mela it was because the days and nights were running together into a blur of puja (ceremony), receiving guests to sit with my Guruji and occasional excursions into the daily melee.
We had been invited to a special fire puja and animal sacrifice at her holy place. My Guru sent me and my guru-brothers in his stead as he said he couldn’t tolerate the animal sacrifice practice, it pains him too much, but since our karmas were grossified enough, it was appropriate for us. It wasn’t untrue. The temples at Kamakhya Mandir in Guwahati, Assam are not large and I’m built like a viking so I had to learn how to fold up and fit into tiny spaces. The four of us were seated around this sacred fire with instructions on what offerings to make and which mantras to chant. The fire was HUGE and with the small space we were in the maximum proximity of its heat.
At one point in time I looked up and the flames were a good three feet above my head. The thing was, we couldn’t move. I remember looking across the fire at one of my guru-brothers and seeing the sweat pouring down his face and at least I knew if this fire was going to consume someone, it would be us all. Nothing left to do but pray to Ma. “Let this fire consume my karmas and let it be the catalyst for transformation.” I recited. I thought about the polyester content in my robes as I felt the fabric heating up.
The more I prayed, chanted and made my offerings to the cleansing fire of transformation, the cooler I felt in my body. It was hot and humid outside as it was July. This was the annual gathering at the mountain dedicated to the Dasha Mahavidya, the Ten Wisdom Mothers, which houses her ten temples. The main temple is to Ma Yashodhara, the Earth Mother. Kamakhya is Kamarupa, the ancient Dakini Queendom whose lands hold the empowerment frequencies of the pathway of transformation through sex and death, creativity and transformation.
It is said during this mela (festival) time that Ma has her moontime (bleeding cycle). During this time a red fluid spontaneously flows from the recessed yoni in the main temple. All the regular temple ceremonies cease and for this week the pre-pubescent girls of the priestly families that maintain the temples are worshiped as Devi.
This is also known as Kumari Puja. For the tantrik sadakahas (practitioners) this is a necessary practice in the syllabus of siddhis (attainments). At least a hundred thousand of the baddest tantrikas pour into the sacred grounds to perform their pujas. It was not actually safe for us to be out and about mingling amongst the crowd, and my Guruji being who he is, most of the action came to us anyway. This was one of the rare occasions we ventured outside. Going out in the nighttime was an absolute no no, as some of the dangerous ends of the tantrik world were in attendance like the Kapalikas (headhunters).
The fire ceremony carried on and our bodies adjusted. If you want positive outcomes from your practice you have to do them wholeheartedly with gusto. At some point in time we were called outside for the animal sacrifice offering. This was the first time I was part of a ceremony such as this and I was nervous. A black goat was brought to a v-shaped stand that was a permanent part of the outside of the temple. The goat's head was placed between the sloped of the V. Bleating and unaware of his fate, a tall muscular tantrika dressed in black robes, most likely a Nath Yogi, held a medium size slightly curved blade in his hand. He wasted no time, after saying mantras, chopped off its head in one fell swoop.
Naturally, a pool of blood formed, and the smell of fresh blood, fire, sweaty bodies, and incense filled the air. My stomach churned. I felt dizzy. “You are the one who wanted to be a tantrika,” I thought to myself. The puja was complete and we silently returned to our homestay. I took a shower and rested in preparation for the evening’s festivities which would involve the prasad (blessed food) of the puja - the consumption of our goat’s sacrifice.
The Mother
Chinnamasta is a form of the Goddess that is indigenous to the lands of northeast India. This area, protected by its rugged and dangerous jungles, was not affected by the influence of Vedic culture until after Buddhism was destroyed in India in 1200 CE. Kamakhya was a seat of yogini and dakini, the knowledge of the Mother LIne teachings, which are rooted in fertility, sex, death, alchemy and transformation.
When Vajrayana tantra spread through the trans-Himalaya region beginning in 750 CE, in an adaptogenic way, Vajrayana melded with the Indigenous practice of each place. Vajrayana in Kamarupa, the historical name for the region, transformed into Dakini University - a seat of preservation and instruction in the sixty-four arts of life embodied in the forms of the 64 yoginis. A school for sex-educators, artists, healers, and the like, Kamarupa was a vision of the fabled Amazon, a Queendom of Ten Wisdom Mothers, Five Taras, Eight Matrikas (Mothers) and Sixty-Four Yoginis. Each of these valued beings was an empowerment master in her own right.
CHHINNAMASTA
Rage in blood hot fury,
Trampling over the cupid couple
Locked in opposition on the Eros- lotus,
Holding Her self-sacrificed head
High in Her left hand,
The analytical chopper in the right,
The yoga-serpent-beauty-sash
Hanging along her shoulder left,
She stands in opposition,
Drinking in glory Her own blood stream
Sharing with the two damsels left and right,
Chhinnamasta, the Self-suicidal revolution!
—Kulavadhuta Satpurananda
This is not a myth, but if you try to find the written sources or other ‘scientific’ proof, it is difficult. That was the intention of the eventual rewriting of her-story and subsequent defamation and denigration of her lineage practice. Under the patriarchy, her understanding of the power of sex and desire as the basis of spiritual transformation was made taboo. Her blood offerings made polluting. Her femme leadership debased.
If you want to know the real story, you will have to engage in rematriation- a returning of your body to the land. Through these embodied processes you can talk to the land yourself as it is holding the legacy. Her divine frequency is alive in all of us, as we have all come into this world through sex. Through her alchemy we learn to stand on passion and desire and transmute this powerful energy to awaken the universal potential that lives in the body in the form of kundalini shakti.
The great goddess cuts off her own head symbolizing the cutting off of ignorance through the alchemical transformation of greed, anger, ignorance, delusion, lust, and jealousy through the very root of all of life - sex. She reveals herself as the dynamic potential for the perception less-perception. Her fertility now in abundance she feeds herself, yogini and dakini - her own Divine Love and Divine Consciousness. She is self-fertilized and self-realized in the transformation of passion to compassion - ever self-sacrificing as the generous Mother.
Jai Ma!
Resources:
We uncover her mysteries, speak to her body technologies, demystify her legacies and embody her teachings in the upcoming course: Sex, Death & Alchemy: Tantra From The Mother Line. Starts May 5th. Online & recorded + community space.
A short talk on the iconography of Ma Chinnamasta:
An therapeutic embodiment practice to connect to your womb space of creativity:
A Yoga Nidra practice to support your Rematriation:
So powerful! and such a journey. Thank you!