Following The Breadcrumb Trail - Part One
On the exit from Covid collective-contraction we decided as a family that life was in fact for living and we were going to do something radical with ours.
The miracle that occurred to give me entrance to graduate school set the tone for my academic journey. The institute was part of a consortium of theological schools in the University of Chicago community thus allowing me an opportunity to drink deeply from the well of knowledge and explore diverse views.
With the Catholics I studied Islam and Qur’an, with the Lutherans I studied Arabic and Interfaith Dialogue. My homebase was with the Unitarian-Universalists with whom my rooting in Ethics and Comparative Religious Methodology was formed. Able to take classes and participate in extracurriculars at the University of Chicago Divinity School, I found myself in courses on Orientalism, putting on conferences with the Ethics Club and enriching myself in a course on Islamic Love Poetry.
Ode 44 - Hafiz
Last night, as half asleep I dreaming lay,
Half naked came she in her little shift,
With tilted glass, and verses on her lips;
Narcissus-eyes all shining for the fray,
Filled full of frolic to her wine-red lips,
Warm as a dewy rose, sudden she slips
Into my bed – just in her little shift.
Said she, half naked, half asleep, half heard,
With a soft sigh betwixt each lazy word,
‘Oh my old lover, do you sleep or wake!’
And instant I sat upright for her sake,
And drank whatever wine she poured for me –
Wine of the tavern, or vintage it might be
Of Heaven’s own vine: he surely were a churl
Who refused wine poured out by such a girl,
A double traitor he to wine and love.
Go to, thou puritan! the gods above
Ordained this wine for us, but not for thee;
Drunkards we are by a divine decree,
Yea, by the special privilege of heaven
Foredoomed to drink and foreordained forgiven.
Ah! HAFIZ, you are not the only man
Who promised penitence and broke down after;
For who can keep so hard a promise, man,
With wine and woman brimming o’er with laughter!
O knotted locks, filled like a flower with scent,
How have you ravished this poor penitent!
I was not new to what this course was calling Islamic Love Poetry. During my years in West Bengal, we often mingled with Sufi masters and their welcoming communities. The musical tradition of the Bauls of Bengal is an amalgamation of Vaishnavite Sahajiya, Vajrayana, Sufi and Shakta traditions, melded in the cosmopolitan culture of historical Bengal. It was an honor to introduce the works of the great Bengali Sufi Lalon Shah to my class.
Strange Bird of Passage by Lalon Shah
A strange bird of passage
Flits in and out of the cage –
God knows how
If only I could catch it
I’d put on its feet
The fetters of consciousness
Eight rooms and nine doors
And little windows piercing the walls
The assembly room right on top’s
a hall of mirrors
What is it but my hard luck
That the bird’s so contrary
It has flown its cage
And hides in the woods
O Heart, beguiled by your cage
You don’t see it’s built of green bamboo
Lalon says ‘Beware! It will fall apart any day.’
— Translated from the Bengali by Kaiser HaqIn the depths of this class was an invitation to connect to multiple Sufi cultures over a thousand plus year timeline. I found myself enthralled with Al-Andalus. The then empire of the Moors with dual capitol seats in Fez (modern day Morocco) and Granada (modern day Spain). I felt like I was time traveling to a familiar place where Jews, Christians and Muslims lived, exchanged and inspired creativity in each other.
This was the civilization that tantalized the imagination of Western Europe where life could be enriched by societal infrastructure, education and pluralistic-minded leadership. The empire of Al-Andalus possessed multiple systems and sciences such as medicine, higher education, libraries, engineering, astronomy, architecture, advanced mathematics, astrology, surgery, alchemy, urban design, waste management, community health care, religious infrastructure, art, music, design and so much more.
The so-called Islamic Love Poetry that emerged from this era called to me, like a beacon to the homeland.
I am Calling - Ibn Arabi
I am calling to you from afar,
Calling to you since the very beginning of days,
Calling to you across millennia
For aeons of time.
Calling, calling…Since always.
It is part of your being, my voice.
But it comes to you faintly
and you only hear it sometimes.
‘I don’t know’, you may say,
but somewhere you know.
‘I can’t hear’, you say, “What is it and where?”
But somewhere you hear, and deep down,
you know.
For I am that in you,
which has always been.
I am that in you,
which will never end.
Even if you say, “Who is calling?”
Even if you think, “Who is that?”
Where will you run? just tell me.
Can you run away from yourself?
For I am the only one for you
There is no other
Your promise, your reward I am alone,
Your punishment, your longing and your goal.In my heart I felt a deep stirring towards the lands of Al-Andalus, the Sufi Way and this poetic heritage but my allegiances at the time were to Vajrayana Tantra and the Buddhist Nath order of my Guru. Recognizing I had signed onto one path already that had Sufi elements, I decided to save this quest for a later time of unknown arising.
Three years ago we began planning our Ancestor’s Journey. On the exit from Covid collective- contraction we decided as a family that life was in fact for living and we were going to do something radical with ours. We downsized as much as we could, packed up and put everything into storage except the suitcases we departed with to the airport.
Our vision was to visit places where the bones of the ancestors rest, of my mother line, of which we know thanks to 23 & Me. Some of the news was known and some a surprise. Our African ancestors spanned Senegambia, Congo, Nigeria, Angola and Ghana. Our European ancestors originated in Portugal, England, France and Scandinavia.
During this trip, we spent four months in the footsteps of Al-Andalus in Spain, Portugal and Morocco. We rested with our ancestors in Senegal. We allowed the experience to come through, whatever it was meant to be, and the main message from the ancestors in Africa was a welcoming home to rest.
Along the way I met teachers and facilitators of learning that helped me return to the threads I neatly tucked away eighteen years ago during my graduate studies. I returned to Arabic language studies with the hope of being able to read and translate the poetry of Al-Andalus. I learned about the history of the region to decolonize what I had already learned from an orientalist perspective. Through the study of music I connected to the musical tradition that sings these poems to this day.
This is one of the perks of being a homeschool/worldschooling family. The whole family gets to learn together. Study doesn’t have to be a compartmentalized activity and as an adult learner I don’t have to learn about something only because it informs my work or professional certification. I revived study for the sake of life-enrichment and spiritual cultivation and I got to role-model this for my child which I think is very powerful.
I call this life-philosophy ‘following the breadcrumb trail’. Not the full-on analogy of Hansel and Gretel following the witch’s breadcrumbs right into the oven, lol. Just the part that there can be an intuitive path with little clues along the way that guide us to the experiences that shape our learning, growth and humanizing. I need the feeling of magic, of kismet - synchronicity to feel alive.
I am also aligned to the art and aesthetics of life, which I feel in the ancestral whispers of Al-Andalus. Whether these people were my exact ancestors or not, their teachings have been a part of clues that I’ve been following for my entire adult life and I know there’s more to uncover.
The journey continues in part two…………
Resources
The Way of Baul Documentary:
Come with me on an adventure of your OWN making, Morocco 2025 Retreat Info
Love this -- the sense of epiphany and taking hold of life :) x